Choices that we continue to make that do not resonate with our spirits create a constant feeling of unease and unhappiness. You start to wonder is this what life is all about and how did I get to this place? We compromise and put our needs on the back burner always saying yes to others and no to ourselves. Women feel this strongly but from the men that I have spoken with they too feel this angst. Getting our happy back is not a destination we are not searching for a happy place or a person who has extra happy for us to borrow or even a store that sells happy buy the cart load. We may feel like happiness is external most of the time but we must remember authentic happiness is closer than we thought. It resides right there inside each one of us and we can tap into it at our leisure anytime of the day or night.
The first decision to make is to take stock in what you say yes to each day, every month and all year. Heres an example list: I say yes to: credit card debt of $2000, work schedule of 50 hours a week, live in significant other, red bath towels on sale but not what I really like, gym membership $50 per month….
Once you have a list to work with decide if it makes you happy to say yes to these things. How many items bring you happiness? Now make another list of what you say no to, I say no to: a work schedule of 60 hours of work, the gel toothpaste on sale because I like paste, that extra slice of pie 600 calories I don’t need. You get the idea well the goal is to start saying no to things that decrease your happy and yes to the things that truly increase your happiness. This list is supposed to be all about you and your true feelings not pleasing everyone else.
This exercise will do two things one make you accountable for your choices the support your own happiness and two add balance to your yes and no actions. Balance is key to being happy if you can discover that it pleases you to give to others as long as you are taking good care of yourself then you are well on your way to getting your happy back….